Have you heard about women who can shoot golf balls out of their vagina?
Some people call them freaks of nature, I call them Kegel-enthusiasts.
Kegel exercises were introduced to me at the age of 17 by my boyfriend.
A scumbag 12 years older than me.
He told me I should be careful not to lose the virgin-tightness of my pussy as I get older;
I told him to be careful not to lose his hair.
He, the scumbag, let’s call him Dick, told me about how pelvic-floor-muscle exercises can make my vagina Disneyland for the d*ck.
Well, who doesn’t want that?
“Forget about abs,” I was thinking to myself.
“Pelvic floor muscles are the benchmark against which every man will judge me from now on.”
And this is how I embarked on one of the most ridiculous journeys of my life.
I wanted a strong pussy.
WANTED: Pelvic Floor Muscles
HOW TO DO KEGEL EXERCISES
The exercises are simple.
- 1. identify your pelvic floor muscles
- go pee right now, and try to stop your pee in midstream ⇒ those are your muscles
- 2. now start the exercises
- squeeze those muscles, hold for 5 seconds and then relax
- try it 5 times in a row
- then, as you become more expert, aim for 10 seconds
For best results,
focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles.
- Be careful not to flex the muscles of your abdomen, thighs or buttocks.
- Avoid holding your breath.
- Instead, breathe freely during the exercises.
DOES SEX STRETCH THE VAGINA?
Admittedly, I became a Kegel maniac for the wrong reasons.
I wanted to impress a guy that used to tell me horror stories about how vaginas stretch beyond recognition if:
- they are frequently used,
- barred children,
- or accommodate anything else besides his dick.
Unfortunately, the internet is too small to hold all the stories of how stupid I was when I was younger, and how full of shit he was although he was older.
Therefore, let’s stick to the facts.
Intercourse does not permanently stretch the vagina
My so-called “virginal tightness” was nothing else than his inability to arouse me and my reluctance towards having sex.
Anxiety made my vaginal musculature clench, not my virginity.
When you are aroused, your vagina is more welcoming, it is true.
But arousal-related vaginal loosening does not make your vagina feel like the inside of a…
It is more something like being able to insert two fingers instead of one.
Although vaginal looseness can occur after childbirth, especially in older women, it has nothing to do with how often a woman has sex. Intercourse does not permanently stretch the vagina. After relaxing during sex, vaginal muscle tissue naturally contracts – tightens – again.
KEGELS ARE A BIT BORING
Being able to contract your vagina and have total control over it seems appealing, doesn’t it?
But let’s face it, Kegel exercises are boring.
Most women do them once and then forget about them altogether.
There is no immediate gratification for having strong pelvic muscles.
Unlike abs, they can’t be shown off at the beach, so why bother? Right?! Wrong!
A 2014 Brazilian study found that young women with strong pelvic floor muscles tend to be more orgasmic. If these muscles are toned, they can tighten up during sex and not tire out, helping them climax.
But there are more fun methods of strengthening your muscles in an entertaining way.
I call them Orgasmic Kegels, one friend of mine calls them Pussy Yoga, you can call them however you want.
GET A TIGHT VAGINA WITH ORGASMS
Every time a woman has an orgasm, her pelvic floor muscles contract.
So, to avoid doing the boring exercises, you just need to take a vibrator, put a dildo or peeled cucumber inside your vagina, and start having a couple of orgasms.
Since you know where the muscles are located, you should be able to squeeze them hard. This will not only strengthen them but also give you more intense orgasms.
You are probably too young to think about leaking urine when you laugh, cough, or sneeze.
At least I am.
Not even pelvic floor weakness due to childbirth is a hot topic for me, but I can’t imagine anybody turning their back on better orgasms.
I’ve been doing Kegels on and off for more than ten years. The way I do them, they don’t feel like a workout or a burden and I’m grateful if my experience will help you to make Pussy Yoga a part of your life.